(bright music)
(whimsical music)
- [Jude] Only what if, in the end,
I know we're at the beginning, folks,
but just stay with me here,
what if, in the end, I am to blame?
Did I do too little?
Too late?
When do you cross the line?
If you're gonna play the game,
you have to do what I did.
Put the pieces together,
bit by bit,
piece by piece.
Good luck.
- How about somebody just readily
popped you in the fucking head, how about that, huh?
- Cowboy speaks up, huh?
- I'm gonna speak up.
(all argue)
- Obviously somebody pushed the car back here!
- I'm just trying to make a living here!
- You gotta keep acting like some stingy little prick!
(women yell)
- You think I enjoy this?
You think I wanna tow cars for a living?
Now just back off!
I have a college degree, for Christ's sakes.
- In what?
What'd you major in, freaks are us?
- Oh, you just calm down, kitty cat.
- Back off her!
(women scream)
(dramatic music)
- Oh, my gosh!
- Stop it!
(women scream)
Stop it!
(all yell)
- Are you out of your fucking mind?
He's a kid!
- All right, all right!
- Jesus Christ.
- Have a little faith!
- Listen, everybody shut up!
Shut up for a second, okay?
- Take this guy out of here.
- Be careful.
- Come on.
Are you okay?
It's okay, buddy.
Come on out.
Oh, man.
- Oh, my God.
Look at him.
Just look at him.
- Let me get a towel or something.
- How many fingers do you see?
- Where are my glasses?
- Hang on, hang on, I got 'em.
They're a little busted up, buddy, it's all right.
Are you okay?
I'm gonna put 'em on.
You all right?
- I want you to drive yourself to the emergency room.
Can you do that?
Can you drive?
- Come on, let's give this guy some money.
Who's got some cash?
Hang on, hang on, buddy.
- Did you see how hard this guy hit me?
- Oh, come on.
- [Jude] All this blood-letting over 80 bucks?
I don't think so.
Give it to him.
- It won't hurt, it's all right.
This happens to me all the time.
- Honey, don't get blood on you, please.
- There you go, all right.
- I just wonder what would have happened
if I had you one on one.
- You would have done just fine.
- I would have kicked your fucking ass.
- I bet you would have, come on.
Put down my car, all right?
Let's go. - All right.
- I got you money.
- Where is that guy?
Motherfucker packs a punch.
- [Jude] Too bad he can't bottle
some of that testosterone.
He'd make a fortune.
(soft music)
- Son of a bitch.
Did somebody go through my glove compartment?
- What are you talking about now?
- What I'm talking about, Monica,
is somebody swiped my Ray-Bans and my goddamn registration.
Who took my goddamn registration?
People!
- [Jude] Oh, no, someone swiped Lara's Ray-Bans.
To answer your questions, Lara,
we'd have to go three hours earlier and start the game
all over again.
- Uh, your bum.
Your cheeks.
Your rear end.
Rear.
End.
The end.
The end, okay.
- Asshole. - Four.
He's shivering.
You're sick.
You're sick, okay.
Foreign, sick.
Forensic!
- Yeah, bingo! - Yay!
- All right.
- Hey, wait a second, you can't do forensics.
- Why not?
- Because I told you,
you have to do books or TV shows or movies.
- That's the orthodox rules for the timid.
We were doing things that you step over
when you cross the yellow plastic line,
that says "Police line, do not cross."
Yeah.
- [Jude] But you crossed it, didn't you, Barry?
Only about a month ago.
(soft music)
Roses are red,
dumpsters are blue,
dead is forever,
I see you!
Like my car?
My husband was a rich man.
Even if bioterrorists are filling the LA air with anthrax,
Lara and Quinn would make their way
to the butcher counter at Gelson's,
buy the better half of a black Angus cow,
and have their annual all American backyard barbecue.
Not exactly vegetarian.
- Heads up, baby, heads up!
- He scores!
Punt!
Wow, that was great, man.
Come on!
- Whoo, yeah!
What a shot!
- Uh, strong.
Out of breath.
Okay.
- Aren't you guys a little old
to still be playing catch?
- Whoo, oh, yes, baby, come on!
- Okay, fake, fake, down and out!
- Okay, I'm in!
I'm all alone in the zone, hit me, hit me!
What a mess, oh, my God.
- Oh, nice one, Mr. Butter Fingers.
You can clean it up.
- [Jude] They're probably getting to know Barry
just about now.
- You drink a lot of beer, Bar?
I mean, you don't look like you drink a whole lot of beer.
You work out?
Or should I say where do you work out,
because you know, there's no question of it.
- Yeah, I work out.
- Because, you know, Gold's Gym in Venice is still the best.
- How do you know about Gold's, hon?
- I've been there, babes.
- Oh, I didn't know.
- Obviously.
A football hero would know more.
- [Jude] Lara.
The perfect wife.
- I'll give you the paint,
but I won't give you the carpet.
- I gotta have...
I gotta have 90 days to get ready.
- I think 60 days is really fair.
- I'm a five year lease.
- [Jude] And the perfect real estate agent.
- But only 60 days.
Mister.
- Um...
- So Barry, whatever happened to the low key guy
at the office?
- Come on, Quinn, what are you trying to do,
break my spirit over here?
When I'm at work, I'm working,
and when I'm not working, I'm having fun,
especially when it's beer time.
(Barry chuckles)
- I got it.
- All right, I tend to get a little carried away sometimes.
- Just a little rambunctious.
- [Barry] Look, this is the first time
since I've moved out here
that anybody's taken the time
to invite me over to their place just to hang out.
All the guys I grew up with are still back in Syracuse.
I guess I'm just feeling a little bit at home.
- Syracuse, huh?
- Yeah, born and raised.
- They got a hell of a football team out there.
- [Barry] Yeah.
- So who's coaching them this year, do you know?
- This year?
I don't know.
Kind of been out of touch.
- Really?
So what brings you out here?
- Welfare check in Syracuse
or a paying job at Techno Works.
Whatever it takes to survive, my man,
whatever it takes to survive.
- [Jude] Surviving.
Good topic, Barry.
We could work with that.
Three words.
Third word, sounds like "whore."
A hint?
It's Laura's mantra:
"I want more."
(doorbell rings)
- Hey, babes!
- Hey, Lara.
- Okay, let's see if I got this straight,
I did my best for you, baby.
You can't stand the onion dip or the celery sticks?
- Oh, no, no.
It wasn't me who couldn't stand them.
That was...
- Oh, shit, honey, I'm sorry.
- Been redoing things?
Something's changed. - No.
No, it's the same as it was last year.
- No, it's really gorgeous in here.
And I like the way this place is set up
from the other houses in LA, you know,
like your own little getaway.
- I don't think of it as a getaway.
What about you?
You've got nothing but sea at your bedroom door.
- Yes.
It certainly is a lot of distance out those bedroom windows.
- Mm, mm, mm.
This is the good life, Quinn.
You got it made.
- Well, I wouldn't exactly call it Shangri La.
- Come on, you're breaking my heart over here.
You got that beautiful wife,
you've got this great house,
you got that big paying job at Techno Works.
Man, you got it made in the shade.
- I got the mortgage payments,
I got property taxes,
I got plumbing repairs,
of course I got the IRS,
keep going around and around with that.
- IRS?
Shit, that's a shame, man, what happened?
- Oh, I don't know,
mistakes, a misunderstanding.
One mistake!
One mistake, look at my prior stats for the year.
- Quinn, listen to me.
The company's in financial jeopardy
and you're the cause of it.
- Come on, Brolly, please, for Christ's sake,
we're friends, man!
- We're still friends.
- But I'm out of a job.
- [Lara] Hey, everyone!
Look who's here.
- [Quinn] Oh, my God!
Oh, my God.
Hey, how are you?
- [Jude] What a relief to see real friends.
Evan.
Monica.
Practically my niece.
- It's so good to see you.
- Sweetheart.
- What can I say?
- I'm dealing with it, it's okay.
- [Quinn] Barry!
This is Jude, one of our very oldest friends.
- [Monica] And dearest.
- [Jude] Finally meeting Barry face to face.
Brought it all back.
It happened nearly four months ago, in the spring.
He was leaving the office where he worked every day,
probably concentrating on his next appointment,
certainly not aware of any danger.
I had just left that same building, you know.
Paul couldn't have lunch with me that day.
If only I'd stayed.
- What would you have to say to him if he was listening?
- Please don't hurt him.
I just want him back.
- That was Judith Curtiss,
wife of the victim who was abducted
right outside Techno Works where he is president.
- Hello, my darling.
Is it all right?
- Looks like it's gonna be all right,
if we set this up right.
(phone beeps)
(somber music)
- [Jude] If only he talked to me three seconds longer.
I never fully understood what happened.
How they could have failed to simply follow the man back
to where my husband was held captive.
(dramatic music)
If only the FBI had realized
the kidnapper was not dumb enough to believe them
when they said no one would be there
when he picked up the money
and no one would follow him back.
Of course he knew they'd be there.
He'd planned on it.
(tires screech)
If only this, if only that,
I keep going over and over it in my mind.
(cars explode)
It should have been so easy,
it could have been done.
And no one would have taken my darling away from me.
Forever.
Because it's only by the slenderest of chances
that he lost his life.
And the delicacy of that,
the absurdity of it,
drives me through my days,
my nights.
(cheerful music)
- There you go, baby, you're on, you're on.
- Monica's bringing out the cheese right now.
You want some cheese on your burger?
You want cheese on your burger?
- No, no.
- How about you, darling?
- I want cheese, I want double cheese on my burger.
- Looks good.
(soft music)
- Double cheese for you, kid, coming up.
- A little toasted bun.
- Goddamn.
Christ almighty.
Put out that goddamn fire!
I gotta sit out here, I can't even read the newspaper,
I'm breathing in that shit!
- Sorry about that, Max!
- What?
- I'm sorry about that!
- Bullshit!
Every fucking weekend I gotta breathe in that shit!
Every fucking weekend I gotta breathe in
those carcinogenic flames!
It's poisonous, don't you know that?
I wanna sit out here and be able to read a newspaper
without breathing in that shit!
- Friend of yours?
- [Max] And you!
You with that fucking pussy on your chin!
Huh?
Chef Ass Wipe!
- Chef Ass Wipe?
I got your Chef Ass Wipe.
- You what?
- It was nothing, Max!
- [Max] Every fucking weekend I gotta deal with this!
You sit there fanning it like
you're a goddamn Indian sending smoke signals!
And you!
You, you little faggot in the shorts!
You, yeah, you, laughing!
(Barry laughs)
You're laughing, huh?
A joke?
Buddy!
Turn down that goddamn music!
It's like Africa!
- That's a good idea, you know what, you're right,
anything for a neighbor, I'll bring it down.
- You're gonna take that shit from him?
- Easy type.
- How about a little consideration for others?
You're not the only people living here!
- Who is that guy? - Jesus Christ.
- Max Targenville.
(dramatic music)
(Max coughs)
- [Jude] Finally, all the players together
in the same place.
- This is a toast to having Evan in our backyard again
after a year of suffering back in dirty old Pittsburgh
with no beaches.
- Hear, hear!
- Welcome home, huh?
- Absolutely.
- And a toast to the girl he brought back with him.
- Now, I'll drink to that.
- Easy, pal.
(Monica laughs)
- Hey, it'll be just like before, won't it, babes?
- Yeah.
- [Jude] So Barry...
Let's see you get out of this one.
How did you come in contact with the Torrises?
- Well, I started working over at Techno Works
just a few weeks ago.
- You just started?
- Yep.
Just a schlub in the shipping department.
(dramatic music)
- Fuck you. (Quinn laughs)
- So Evan,
how's the work coming?
- What kind of work is that, dude?
- I'm trying to answer, man.
Listen, I used to be a doctor, right,
but now I'm trying to put together
a little something-something with this cat right here.
- [Barry] Nah.
A doctor, that's amazing.
- What's so amazing about that?
- Yeah.
- Well, for one thing, I've never met anyone
who actually had a doctor for a friend.
- That doesn't surprise me.
(Lara laughs)
- You make it sound kind of perverse.
- Well, they're all cons and ripoff artists, let's face it.
Hey, doc, nothing personal.
But no matter how hard things get out there,
no matter how tight the money is,
we're still gonna have our little mishaps
walking across wet kitchen floors,
running little red lights
that we would swear were just yellow seconds ago,
but you guys, you...
You guys, you're still gonna have your big houses,
and your motorboats,
and your ski trips,
and the rest of us,
we're gonna have to live on pork and beans,
macaroni and cheese, why?
Because it's the fucking cheesiest.
- Oh, poor baby has to eat macaroni and cheese?
- Knock it off, Lara.
- Why?
- You wait a second.
You wait one second.
I don't know what kind of doctors you know,
but on my salary,
you don't get ski trips or ski boats
or whatever it is you're talking about.
But one thing I did get
was plenty of bleeding guts to sew back in,
so next time you go reaming on a doctor,
you think about that.
- Is that why you quit, doc?
- Hey, no good, Barry, okay?
No good, I'll tell you something.
I don't happen to be a member of the field,
but Evan is not one of that kind that you're describing.
All right, this guy's got more goddamn integrity
than a saint.
- That's right.
- Psh.
- Go on, Evan,
tell him about one of your life-saving ER stories.
Go on, tell him.
- I don't think this clown's ready for it.
- Come on, doc, tell me a story.
You ever heard of the Hippocratic oath?
- You're an asshole.
(Barry chuckles)
- Thanks a lot, Bar, for killing the party.
- I'm the only fucking life in this party!
- [Jude] God.
How am I gonna get these people to stop pretending?
Including me.
- I can't believe I let that guy say that to me,
just manipulate me and pull my strings like that.
- Honey, that idiot didn't know what he was talking about.
Come here.
Oh, Evan, you gotta let this thing go.
(orchestral music)
- [Lara] You burn the meat every fucking time, Quinn.
Oh, well, I'll tell you what, old MacDonald,
why don't scrape up the rest of those cow chips there
and bring them back into the barn?
(Quinn sighs)
- He should know.
- [Lara] Come on, Jude.
Can't we just talk about it some other time?
- Did anybody ever say anything to you at Techno Works
about the company president?
- Not a thing.
- His name was Paul Curtiss.
He was abducted from the parking lot
three and a half months ago.
Actually, three months and 19 days ago.
Right there in front of the offices at gunpoint.
- Holy shit.
- [Jude] Broad daylight.
The man pushed Paul,
forced Paul into a car and they took off.
Just like that.
- Jesus Christ.
- Uh, can't we just relax here?
I mean, this is supposed to be a party.
Can't we just have some fun, please, Jude?
- [Jude] I was in the classroom when the police called me.
I got the ransom note the next day.
I remember thinking good thing we're a dual income family.
- Jude, come on, baby,
you're just gonna get yourself upset.
- They fucked up though, you know,
they screwed up when they went to do the tradeoff.
The kidnapper led them into a smokescreen.
They lost him.
They thought they had him, but they didn't.
(cars explode)
They found my husband though.
Three days later.
In a dumpster.
Out back of some warehouse.
They never found his killer though.
- I just don't know what I'm gonna do out here, Evan.
- What do you mean
you don't know what you're gonna do out here?
You're in ecology major, for Christ's sake.
I mean, we're in the land of smog,
you can invent something,
you can purify the air.
- Evan, look.
Come here. (truck beeps)
- [Evan] Is that for us?
- I don't know, but it kind of looks like it.
- I'll go tell them.
- God, with all these hangups we've been getting lately,
that gun sure feels good to have around.
- What hangups?
- Oh, you know, phone calls in the middle of the night.
(phone rings)
I pick it up and nobody's there,
like someone's checking to see if we're home or not,
or trying to push our buttons or something.
Fucking freak!
Okay, fine, because if some scumbag
comes sneaking through our window one night,
he's gonna sneak himself into some serious bad news.
(Barry chuckles)
- [Jude] Real good, Lara.
- Hey!
Somebody's car's getting towed out front!
- Whose?
- [Evan] Not mine.
- Baby, can you go check?
- Aw, fuck, are you kidding me?
Neverending problems around here, Jesus.
Hey, man!
Hey!
Hey, man!
What are you doing?
Hey, excuse me.
I didn't call a tow truck.
- Sorry, sir, vehicle's blocking this person's driveway.
- This isn't blocking anybody's driveway.
- You are fucking weird.
Do you always get up on picnic tables and strut your stuff?
- Lara!
- You're a pussy tease.
I'll be in the maid's corners, back of the house.
Find me there in ten.
Oh.
(dramatic music)
- Hey, what are you doing?
I live right here.
Hey, Lara!
- That's my goddamn car!
- You got some sort of idea or something?
- Hey, what are you doing?
- This is your vehicle, you say?
- Yeah.
That's not where I parked it though,
I parked it right over here in my driveway!
- Sorry, wasn't where I found it.
Someone called it in,
here it is. - What?!
- Do you have an ID?
- You mean like my badge?
- No, no, no, like, I mean, something is seriously wrong
if you think we're gonna let you show up with a tow truck
and take all our cars away.
- [Barry] Yeah, it doesn't look like
anybody triple A's send over.
This could be a scam.
- Well, if that's all it takes to make you feel better, sir,
I can make sure you get a prominent display
of the crack of my ass.
- No, but seriously,
don't you have to have some kind of ID or something,
like taxi cab drivers do
with the little mug shots up front?
- You sure are pretty, peach.
Look, peach, you got any questions,
you just call the number on the side there, okay?
- [Quinn] I got a question.
I got a big fucking question.
Who called you in the first place, huh?
I mean, these people aren't even in town.
I'm watching their goddamn house for them.
- Sorry, man, didn't get a name.
- What do you mean you didn't get a name?
- Look, all I need is an address, okay?
Either there's a car tow there when I get there,
or there isn't.
- So what are you talking about?
You didn't even check?
All you had to do was ring their doorbell,
that's all you had to do!
- How am I supposed to know which door to knock on?
- Well, you could start by checking the house
that you're towing the car from, for starters.
Just to find out that there's no one fucking home!
- Let's just suppose for a minute
that I've got nothing better to do with my day
than to go marching up that driveway
and start to try to figure out
if I've got the right car blocking the right driveway.
After about 30 minutes, you know what that tells me?
Well, besides my thumb being up my ass,
I realize that these nice folk must have gone out
for a pleasant walk somewhere
because they couldn't get their car out of the driveway
because some inconsiderate bitch-
- Hey, hey, watch it, okay?
- Okay, well, okay, whatever.
Whatever, fine, all right?
Just put my car down and I will move it out of the way.
- No problem, lady.
80 bucks and you got all four wheels back on the ground.
- [Lara] 80 bucks?!
What the hell are you talking about, 80 bucks?
- Two in the air, two on the ground,
80 bucks to get four back down, that's it.
- You make it sound like it's some act of God.
- Hey, listen, turbo.
(Barry laugh)
- Turbo!
- Probably find that real funny, huh?
Look, I'm not here to argue with you people, all right?
80 bills or a trip to the impound on your own time later,
it doesn't make a difference to me,
but they're still gonna charge you the 80 down there
plus another 20 a day for storage.
- What the hell are you talking about, 20 a day?
I didn't even park it here in the first place!
(Quinn sighs)
- Fuck!
Fuck!
Targenville!
- You figure Targenville had something to do with this?
- Did you lock your doors?
- When I parked, I always do.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, did you roll up your windows?
- Always.
- [Quinn] What about when you went grocery shopping?
Remember you were running around,
do you remember that?
And what about the alarm?
You always forget this when you're shopping!
Goddammit.
Yeah, that's it, that son of a bitch,
he rolled your car in front of the driveway.
- That's about it.
- [Evan] He wouldn't do that, not even Targenville.
- [Quinn] Bullshit!
- [Jude] This is getting out of hand.
- [Quinn] ...the emergency brake
and rolled the car from the driveway!
- Look, look, excuse me, excuse me.
Look, why don't you just hit me up with the 80 bills
for now, all right?
- I don't have 80!
- She just went grocery shopping, man,
we're having a barbecue.
We're all tapped out.
Listen, listen, you take a credit card?
- Nope, cash only.
So we got any cash?
- I'm broke.
- What about the rest?
You look like you got cash.
- I bought the beer.
- Wow, big spender, turbo.
- Listen to me, you little shit.
I wouldn't care if I had 500 on me,
I still wouldn't fork over 80 bucks
to some low life tow truck extortionist
with a shaved head like a pink fuzzy dildo
right front of my own goddamn house!
(all chuckle)
- Go get him, baby.
- Ma'am.
Um, I'm just too much of a gentleman to respond to that
with any of the replies that readily popped into my mind.
Have a nice day, beautiful.
- How about somebody just readily popped you
in the fucking head, how about that, huh?
- Whoa, cowboy speaks up, huh?
- I'm gonna speak up.
- This is riduculous.
- You're damn right it's getting ridiculous what's going on.
Obviously somebody pushed the car back here!
- I'm just trying to make a living here!
- You gotta keep acting like some stupid little prick!
(women yell)
- You think I enjoy this?
You think I wanna tow cars for a living?
Then just back off!
I have a college degree, for Christ's sakes.
- In what?
What'd you major in, freaks are us?
- Oh, you just calm down, kitty cat.
Back off!
(women scream)
- Hey, cowboy!
(women scream)
- Stop it!
- Hey!
Hey!
- That's enough!
(dramatic music)
(all yell)
- Are you out of your fucking mind?!
He's a kid!
- All right, all right!
- Jesus Christ!
- Have a little faith!
- Everybody shut up!
Shut up for a second, okay?
- Get this guy out of here.
- Are you okay?
- It's okay, buddy.
Come on out.
- Oh, man.
- [Evan] What the hell's the matter with that prick?
- [Quinn] I don't know, he's out of his mind, come here.
You okay?
You all right?
- [Evan] Listen, I'm a doctor, look at me, look at me.
How many fingers am I holding up?
Huh?
- Let me get a towel or something.
- How many fingers do you see?
- Where are my glasses?
- Hang on, hang on, I got 'em.
They're a little busted up, buddy.
It's all right, you okay?
I'm gonna put 'em on.
You all right?
- Listen, I want you to drive yourself
to the emergency room, can you do that?
Can you drive?
- Come on, let's give this guy some money.
Who's got some cash?
- Did you see how hard this guy hit him?
No way.
- Oh, come on, Evan.
- [Quinn] This is all the cash I got,
I don't know how much it is.
- Just give it all to him.
- Take it easy, all right?
Here, just cash for you.
- I won't hurt, it's all right.
This happens to me all the time.
- Honey, don't get blood on you, please.
- Come on, there we go, all right.
- I wonder what would have happened
if I had you one on one.
- You would have done just fine.
- I would have kicked your fucking ass.
- I bet you would have, come on.
Put down my car, all right?
Let's go.
- All right. - I got your money.
- Where is that guy?
- He's over here.
- Motherfucker packs a punch.
(soft music)
- Son of a bitch.
Did somebody go through my glove compartment?
- What are you talking about now?
- What I'm talking about, Monica,
is somebody swiped my Ray-Bans and my goddamn registration.
- He's probably got a concussion
or a couple of ribs broken or something.
- Jesus Christ, Jude, would you shut up?
- She's right, he's got a mild concussion,
probably gonna need a couple of stitches.
You wanna drive him down there?
- Who took my goddamn registration?
People!
- All right.
Thank you.
- Hello?
- Wow.
All right, folks, let's move along, show's over.
- Show's over.
- Come on, let's go watch me fuck up
another round of burgers.
- Sure you're okay, honey?
- I'm fine, this guy's crazy though.
- Oh, for Christ's sake.
Come on, I need a shot of something.
(dramatic music)
- I'm sorry if this hurts.
- No, that's okay.
- You sure were good with that kid today.
- Kid?
- Mm-hmm.
- He's probably older than you.
Everybody likes it when you show hair.
- You really like helping people.
- Oh, no, don't you start with me.
Don't do it.
- Okay.
(water runs)
- Where's Evan?
- Probably went to dress his wounds.
- I think I better go do the same.
- Uh, babe, I'm feeling a little goofy.
- I can understand that.
- I think I need to go get some Prozac
and lay down for a little bit.
- Oh.
Hon.
Oh, man.
Lara's got a little bit of a nervous disorder, you know,
I think her pituitary or something,
one of her glands is out of wack.
(whimsical music)
- Since when is Prozac a glandial beneficiary?
- What?
(both moan)
- Take a pill, pretend it never happened.
- Yes!
- What's wrong with you?
You used to be so much fun.
- You used to be you.
(both moan)
- Don't analyze me, okay?
You're an English lit professor, for Christ's sake,
you're not a psychiatrist.
- Perception has no jurisdiction, dear.
(both moan)
I remember...
- I remember fucking what?
- When you used-
- "I remember when, remember,"
what an expression.
(both moan)
- What's got you down, Quinn?
You're having trouble with the latest IRS team?
What did they do now?
Did they come right to the house
and hold you at gunpoint?
(both moan)
- You can't tell me that you wanna spend
the rest of your life looking at pieces of paper
and handling money.
You love helping people and you're good at it.
- A lot of people do that,
a lot of people make a fine living doing that.
Quinn is doing it and I can be a part of it.
- Quinn.
Got a question for you.
- Go ahead, shoot.
- What are you gonna do about Targenville?
- What do you mean?
- What do you mean what are you gonna do about Targenville?
- What I mean is, Jude,
he's the one that caused that whole thing to happen
out there in the first place.
That's what I mean.
- You split a guy's head,
who, by the way, is lying on the ground,
and then you've got the nerve to blame it on someone
who isn't even there?
- If my memory serves me correctly,
the cowboy's the one who swung first, not me.
- A clear cut case of self-defense.
- You got it.
- Jude, control yourself, okay?
- Shit talker.
- [Barry] We seem to be getting side tracked here.
Now let's get back on track.
Neither one of us are the ones
who broke into Lara's car,
neither one of us are the ones
who swiped the stuff out of her glove compartment,
and neither one of us are the ones
who called the towing service
after her car was pushed
in front of someone else's driveway.
Now, Quinn,
that cocksucker over there,
he's the one.
He's got us going against each other, you know what I mean?
Now, if you ask me,
I'd forget about my prowess and shit
and I'd give you ten to one that goddamn neighbor of yours
is the one who's rattling your cage
and hanging up on you at night.
- Can I talk to you about it for a moment?
Could I talk to you just for a moment, please?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Just a second.
- Go on.
Go on, leave me out here all by myself.
Solve all your problems.
- That guy out there is out of his mind.
- I would say he's a little rambunctious,
no doubt about that.
- Excuse me, but five year olds are rambunctious,
that guy's an asshole.
(soft music)
- Fucking idiots.
- And that whole bit about Syracuse,
I'm not buying that crap.
- Neither am I.
- Have you been to Syracuse?
It's a tiny little town with a couple of smokestacks
billowing a bunch of toxins in the air
for everybody to breathe,
and the only ray of light in the whole town
is that university on the hill.
Everybody loves the orange men,
that guy doesn't even know who the fucking coach is
for the football team.
- That is kind of weird, man.
I don't know what the fuck I'm gonna do about it.
- Well, everybody's fucked up one way or another, you guys.
- Get rid of him!
- Wait a minute, Jude,
you're the one that asked me to invite him
in the first place.
- Wait a minute, you invited him?
- Right, I apologize.
When I heard there was a new man at the office,
I just thought he should feel welcome.
But-
- But you never met him, right?
- No.
And how was I to know he would get that crazy?
- You know what?
I gotta tell you,
there's a certain amount of protocol involved here
at this point.
- Protocol?
- Yes, Jude.
I work with the guy, remember?
- [Evan] Wait, wait, wait. (phone rings)
I vote we throw all and any protocol out the window
at this point.
- He is a lunatic.
- [Quinn] Well, maybe he is,
but I can't just grab him and throw him out.
- Can somebody get that please?
- I'll get it.
(phone continues ringing)
Hello?
- [Barry] Hey, Monica!
What are you guys doing?
- Barry?
How could you be on this phone?
- [Barry] Because I'm in Honolulu, babe, that's why!
Now, look over your left shoulder.
- Christ.
(Barry laughs)
Evan!
- [Evan] We're in the kitchen!
- Say cheese.
- You better come now.
- One sec.
- [Barry] Let me talk to the man of the house
because I got good news.
- What?
- It's Barry.
- Barry?
Oh, God.
Quinn!
- What now?
- I told you this guy's bad news.
- This is really getting out of hand.
- Barry?
- Quinn, over here!
Come on in, the water's fine.
- What the hell are you doing over there?
- [Barry] No, look, it's okay,
I'm just over here getting Lara's stuff.
Targy said no problem.
- Targy, my ass, get the fuck out of there.
- [Barry] Quinn, will you relax?
Everything is okay, man.
You know, Targy's not a bad listener,
once you sit him down and spell everything out for him.
Look, I got nothing but apologies over here.
He said it's just some big misunderstanding or something,
you know, you guys ought to try
to work things out more often.
- Okay, listen to me, man!
Okay, what part of get the fuck out of there
do you not understand?
Hey, get the fuck out of there!
- One second, I'll be right back.
- What's going on?
- Why don't you just hang up the phone
and leave him over there?
- I can't get through to this guy,
I feel like I'm speaking French or something.
I'm at the end of my rope.
- Hey, Jude!
- Barry, get the fuck out of the house.
- [Barry] Look, Targy's extended a real cordial invite.
I think he wants you guys to come over here,
bury the hatchet or something, you know?
But look, when he puts it the way he's putting it,
if I were you, I'd take him up on it,
come on over here and you guys work everything out, okay?
(phone beeps)
- This is a nightmare, man.
- Hello? (dramatic music)
Quinn?
- Maybe you ought to just call the cops, Quinn.
- Cops?
I mean, that's the last thing I wanna do.
I mean, they got enough to worry about out there.
Look.
This is what I want you to do,
I want you to stay here,
and I want you not to say another fucking thing,
and you give me a hand, okay?
- Jesus Christ, just leave him there.
Evan, don't go.
- Honey, what do you want me to do,
let him go over there by himself?
I'm gonna help get that kook out of there
and then we'll come back
and we'll get our things and we'll go, okay?
- Quinn!
- Look, just stay here, okay?
(dark music)
(door closes)
- Jude, hi!
I just came by to see Quinn and here you are.
- Yeah, you know how classes end off early
towards summer vacation,
so I thought I'd just come on down
and have lunch with all of you.
- Oh, um, shit, you know,
it's a shame because Quinn just got a call yesterday
and he and Paul,
they have to go upstate today on some business.
So we won't be able to do it this time with you.
Okay, bye-bye.
So good to see you.
- That's funny.
Paul didn't mention a meeting to me this morning.
- [Secretary] Can I help, Mrs. Curtiss?
- Oh.
I was gonna go out to lunch with Quinn, but...
- Mrs. Curtiss is here for lunch, sir.
- I know exactly what you're saying, Bob, yes.
Sure thing, well, I mean,
I'm more excited than you are.
Are you kidding me?
Hey, Jude.
Yeah, absolutely.
I mean, Paul's excited too, so.
Uh-huh. (phone beeps)
Okay.
We'll see you then.
Of course you can count on it.
All right, bye.
Ow!
God, you don't understand,
this is not the kind of client that you cut your teeth on.
This is the kind of client that, if the deal goes, boom!
Instant legend.
I mean, a legend.
I mean, unbelievable, isn't it?
He just called and made this thing
absolutely come through just now.
(dark music)
(Barry laughs)
- What goes around comes around.
- Quinn.
Maybe we should just call them first.
- Come on, man.
Huh?
(knocks on door)
Like he's really gonna hear that.
(bangs on door)
- Isn't this the guy that was complaining about your music?
- [Quinn] Yes.
Can you believe this?
Hey!
(bangs on door)
(loud orchestral music)
(bangs on door)
- Hey, there you are!
- What the hell is going on here, huh?
Where's Targenville?
- What, not even a fucking hello?
Now, come on in.
The place is stocked like a liquor bar,
make yourselves a drink, anything you like.
I think it's called hospitality.
It's for free, come on.
(Barry laughs)
- Hospitality is when you invite someone into your own home.
- Whatever.
- Where the hell is Targenville, huh?
- Do you have to shout?
He's right over here, come on.
Come on, come on, come on, come on.
Ta-da!
Here he is!
(Barry laughs) - Max!
- Jesus Christ.
- Or General Custer,
depending on your historical orientation.
Plays more for Custer for me.
- Oh, my God, I think he's dead.
- Oh, you better hope he is, Quinny, because he knows,
I told him.
I know, and now he knows.
- He's knocked out.
Call 911, call the cops now.
- Wait a minute.
- Wait a minute, my ass!
He's not gonna make it, Quinn, get on the phone!
- Just wait a goddamn minute!
- Call them now!
Make the call!
- Just let me think, for Christ's sakes.
- Fore!
- What are you doing?
What are you doing?
What's going on around here?
- What, what's going on?
Paul Curtiss, Ev, remember him?
Late great head of Techno Works.
(Barry chuckles)
How much would you say he was worth, huh, baby?
How much?
- I was upstate.
I was upstate on a business meeting.
- How far upstate?
- I don't know how far upstate,
but I was there on a business meeting.
Paul sent me there himself.
- That's right, your good friend Paul.
Now, I gotta tell you something, Quinny,
that threw even me for a loop.
I mean, I couldn't believe when I saw
Jude walk into the house.
And I'm thinking to myself,
"These people were actually friends?"
How the fuck do you do something like that
to a friend, Quinny?
- I was...
I was upstate, Ev.
I was just upstate on a business meeting.
- Well, what are you doing
wasting your time arguing with me?
Call the cops, 911, the phone's right there.
Targy's not gonna tell them anything,
and even if he does, what do you care?
You don't mind people sniffing around.
You're in the clear, right?
You were upstate.
On business.
(Barry cackles)
- Quinn, just dial the phone, don't listen to him.
Dial the phone, dial 911 now.
- Make the call, make the call!
- [Evan] Quinn, what's the matter?
Quinn, don't tell me that what he's saying is true.
- Everything.
- [Quinn] Just listen to me, Ev!
Listen to me, okay?
I was upstate!
I was upstate, man!
I was upstate, man.
I was upstate on a business meeting, man.
(Barry cries mockingly)
- What the hell's the matter with you?
I'll do it myself.
- Evan, don't!
- Whoa!
Do you have an idea what your good friend
is gonna look like if they throw the switch?
Well, me neither.
But I can tell you one thing,
they're not gonna use you for a GQ poster boy.
(Barry laughs)
Ah, that gave you pause for thought, huh, doc?
Well, I'm glad it gives you pause for thought,
but I'm gonna tell you something right now.
If I thought that you were gonna go to the authorities
after I got a hold of the goods,
I'd have to take you out of the picture, believe me.
You and Mr. University over there.
(Evan yells) (Barry yells)
Come on!
Come on, yeah! (Barry laughs)
(gun cocks)
I don't think so, Quinn!
This isn't your barbecue anymore.
(gun fires) (Evan groans)
Bad day for phones.
- [Lara] Oh, great.
Piss.
(loud orchestral music)
Hi there, officers.
- Hi.
- Is there a problem?
- Uh, yeah, we got a couple of calls
that there was an altercation at this address.
- Oh, it was just a little scuffle, you know.
Things got a bit too hot, but everything's okay now.
- [Officer] Uh-huh.
Hi, can you come on down here for a minute?
- Hi.
- Can you tell me what happened?
- Oh, just a misunderstanding.
There was a tow truck driver
and tempers flaring, people yelling.
That's it, no big deal.
- Targy pulled this on me
when I got a little upset at first with him.
Gotta admit though, it did come in handy.
I wouldn't kill your friend, babes.
I've always found the way to get what I want
without committing murder,
so I hope that we can strike a deal
before our friend's neighbor here flies the friendly skies.
Hmm?
- We were in the back having a barbecue,
it was kind of nice actually.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
We got some extra burgers.
- Oh, really? - Yeah.
- Burn me for talking, you burn for Curtiss.
That's tit for tat on your part, man.
The balance of power.
If the Cold War taught us one goddamn thing,
it taught us that the concept works.
It's not just viable, it's fucking practical.
- So nobody that was in the fit is here now, right?
- No. - Was it your boyfriend?
- No, not mine.
- Do you have a boyfriend?
- I do.
- How about you, do you have a boyfriend?
- I have a husband. - Oh, okay.
- What's going on over there?
- Oh, that guys just likes to play his music loud.
But it's okay.
- It's really loud. - Yeah.
It doesn't bother me though.
- Oh, well, you know the thing is it's a little loud,
I don't want somebody else complaining.
Why don't you go over there
and tell him to turn it down a little?
- You want me to do that now?
- Yeah, I want you to do it now, all right,
so we don't have to come back here again
if somebody else calls.
(loud orchestral music)
(glass shatters)
- Breaking and entering.
Small robbery gone bad.
Ha.
- Yeah, that'll fool 'em.
(radio chatters)
- Excuse me, I'll be right back.
Abe Lincoln 30, go ahead.
(radio chatters)
All right 10-4, we'll be right there.
Come on, we gotta go!
- What, what do you want now?
- [Officer] 2-11, let's move!
- Take him out of here, go clean him up,
do something with him.
- Come on.
(Evan grunts)
And what about him?
- [Barry] What about him?
- We can't just leave him there like that.
- What, that matters to you?
(Barry laughs) A guy like you?
That fucking cocksucker violated your wife's car.
He violated your wife!
Give me a fucking break.
You hate that bastard!
You hate him!
Be right back.
(dark music)
- Monica. - Yeah?
- I want to talk to you.
- What's up?
- I want you to get out of here.
- Dude, I realize this is no picnic,
but I'm not leaving without Evan.
- Honey, there might not be time.
- What do you mean?
- Look, I...
Here it is.
Do you remember out on the patio or somewhere
Barry saying he just wanted a job,
a job at a company no one would go near
after all that media hysteria?
- Right.
- If that's what he wanted,
then why did he act so strangely
when I first saw him at Techno Works?
- Yes, may I help you?
- Is Quinn Torris here?
- Hold on one second, I'll dial his extension.
- Bingo.
I love that name, Techno Works!
Works for me.
- [Jude] He acted strangely
because he wasn't there to get a job at all.
He was just looking to find Quinn.
So I thought why?
So with all my other suspicions,
I followed him home last week.
(dark music)
I couldn't believe what I saw there.
He lives just above-
- [Lara] So what are you guys talking about?
Looks pretty secretive to me.
- Lara, um.
I mean, thanks for the invite,
but I don't feel comfortable here anymore
what with this being a kind of phone-in gathering.
- Oh, come on, Jude.
It'll get better in a minute or two.
Stick it out at one of my bad parties
like you used to at my good ones.
- Yes, well, I can see the justice of that.
Can you?
- Uh, duh.
I just said that.
- Right.
Well, say a lovely goodbye to Quinn for me, will you?
Lara.
Will you?
- Yeah, sure.
- It was so good to see you again.
- I love you.
- I love you too.
- Now, you do what I say, okay?
Very important to me.
- Okay.
Be safe.
(door closes)
- So, Monica, what were you guys talking about over there?
- Would you just leave that alone, Lara?
I don't get you, I really don't.
- I don't get you, I really don't.
- I should have listened to you, man.
I should have listened to you.
This is fucking crazy, man.
Listen, here's what we're gonna do, okay?
Here's what we're gonna do,
we're just gonna play along.
We're gonna play along until we figure out
exactly what the hell to do.
And then we're gonna bust out of here, okay?
You with me?
- I remember Paul, Quinn.
He was a nice guy.
- Yeah.
He was a good guy.
(bangs on door)
(dark music)
- [Quinn] Mr. Curtiss, listen to me very carefully.
If I see your face or you see mine,
I'm gonna have to kill you, and I will.
So I want you to drag your chair across the concrete floor,
facing away from the door,
put your jacket over your head.
We're gonna come in and drop off some food.
- Go on, open it.
(dark music)
(Lara laughs hysterically)
- What is wrong with you?
- Ow!
- Be quiet, he's gonna know.
- [Evan] You did it.
How could you do this?
(Evan cries)
Why'd you do that, man?
I looked up to you.
I respected you.
You fucked up, you fucked up big with this.
- Whose side are you on?!
- Oh, fucking don't touch me! - Whose side are you on, man?
Are you with him, or are you with me?
(Evan cries)
Hey, man.
Hey, hey, man.
You know me.
- Search and destroy!
(glass shatters)
- I guess this...
I guess he's getting rid of the evidence, huh?
(both laugh nervously)
- Yeah.
Yeah, it's him.
You don't believe him, do you?
Evan?
Do you?
- And to think I used to be jealous of you.
(phone rings)
- [Barry] I'm gonna straighten this place up!
- Hello?
- [Lara] Quinn.
What in the name of Christ is going on over there?
- We're just hashing a couple things out, okay, hon?
- Well, get your ass back over here.
Didn't you see the cops out front?
- What cops?
- Right out front!
They got a bunch of complaints from the neighbors.
- What kind of complaints?
- What kind of complaints do you think?
- Are they still out there?
- No, they got another call or something.
You sound really worried, Quinn.
- No, no, no, I'm not worried about it.
Don't worry about it, all right?
We'll be right over.
- What does we'll be right over mean?
- It means that we'll be right over, okay?
- Let me talk to Monica.
- What's going on?
- Um, just wait here.
- Where are you going?
- I gotta get something.
(suspenseful music)
(Evan coughs)
- Going somewhere, boys? (gun cocks)
Huh?
Look what I found, it almost fits.
What, are you abandoning me?
Come on, let's go.
What the hell's this?
Come on!
Open the fucking the door!
(dark music)
Search the house!
Targy!
I'll fucking pinch you out!
Quinn, you find that son of a bitch!
Cocksucker.
(suspenseful music)
Quinn, you find that son of a bitch!
(Barry yells)
- Break into my house!
Try to murder me!
(glass shatters)
- Eat shit, neighbor.
I don't want you calling and hanging up anymore,
do you hear me?
I don't want you calling and hanging up anymore,
do you got it?
You got it? (glass shatters)
No more hangups!
I've fucking had it!
I don't want you calling and hanging up in my house anymore!
You understand me?
Not one more fucking time, ever again!
Ever again!
Goddammit!
Fucking RCA's.
(glass shatters)
You know, I fucking hate you.
This is the last time you fuck up my barbecue.
You got me?
Last fucking time!
And where's my wife's registration?
Where is it?
Talk to me!
Answer me!
Where's her registration?
And where are her goddamn Ray-Bans?!
Where are they?!
Tell me!
- Hey, Quinn.
He's tough.
Finish him, Quinn.
Finish him.
(Quinn pants)
- You do it.
Go ahead, you do it.
I'd love to see you lose all your confidence.
(Quinn chuckles)
You'll never sleep again.
(dark music)
(Barry chuckles)
- You're one tough fuck, Targy.
- I got fired.
- Paul's such a shithead.
- Oh, well.
(knocks on glass)
- You know, baby, I'd stop all this,
but I'm doing it for us.
Do you have any idea how much property
that guy would have bought?
- Oh, God, Lara, come on.
You never bring anything home. - But I would have,
if you hadn't found just the right moment to drop by.
(Evan groans)
- You bailing on me?
You bailing on me too, Ev?
- I think you bailed on yourself, man.
You fucked up, you're the biggest asshole there is!
- Hey!
- Don't you think I know it?
Don't you think I know
that I'm the worst asshole that ever lived?
You don't think I know that?
I wake up every morning, man,
and I vomit a sigh of relief that it was only a dream.
It was just a fucking dream, I thank God.
And then I realize that it wasn't a dream, man.
I killed my friend.
I killed my friend, Ev.
There's no going back, there's no reversing it,
there's no taking it away.
I'm on a ride with death every morning, Ev.
Day in, day out.
(Lara yells)
- Is Evan home?!
(Barry yells) (glass shatters)
- [Lara] Stop it!
That's my stuff!
- Oh, there she is!
There she is, my little dream!
My little golden girl!
(Barry yells) (Lara screams)
She's a fucking nightmare, Ev.
She's been fucking everybody for take-home pay.
(glass shatters)
And she said that she'd stop, man,
she said she'd stop if I bam!
She's just like, well, that's wishful thinking,
wishful thinking,
you can't let him go now,
he knows us,
he'll tell the police.
- And you believed her?
- Stupid, I guess.
- [Evan] And that's supposed to justify it?
Quinn, that's supposed to justify it?
You had some choices to make, my friend,
before you fucked up two people's lives, goddammit!
- Where is he?! - Stop it, Barry!
- You should have thought about that.
- Evan!
- What the hell, Quinn!
- [Barry] Come back here!
- Quinn, what are you doing telling tall tales?
Just shut up!
Shut your goddamn mouth!
(all yell)
- Evan, just stay out of it.
Stay out of it.
- What is wrong with you, huh?
What's gone wrong, are you out of your mind?
(Quinn yells)
(Barry yells mockingly)
(Barry laughs)
- I always wanted to do that.
(dark music)
- Thanks, Bar.
- I guess that makes me hero of the day, huh?
Isn't that what it makes me?
Or did I become a killer just like you?
- Way to go, Barry. - I know what you are.
I know what you are.
You're not from Syracuse.
That was a lie,
you didn't even know the coach of the goddamn orange men.
- Gee, I didn't even think of that.
Pretty good radar you got there, Ev.
I'm gonna have to start paying attention
to little things like that.
- Evan, no!
(Evan groans)
- No, no, no, back over there, darling.
Actually, I'm born and raised
just from outside a little borough called Brooklyn.
Anyone got a fucking problem with that?
Good.
Figured it'd be better
if not too many people knew about that out here.
And do you know why?
Huh?
You're the one with the radar, Ev.
Left a few snarls back there
that wouldn't look too good on the old fucking resume,
you know what I mean?
All right now, my newfound friends.
Time for us to take a little bit of a check on reality.
Don't you think?
And here it is.
Life is a game.
Just a little game of charades.
- God, you're such a psychopath.
- What?
- I said you're a psychopath.
- No, no, no, my little dove.
- Don't touch her.
- This is nothing but a game.
I mean, look at you guys, huh?
You're all cozy-like
in your little fucking suburban biospheres
with your cars and your barbecues,
like some fucking reppies out of a yuppie
motherfucking white commercial!
God!
This food is so fantastic!
Yes, but I need to know who made the wine.
The wine is wonderful! (Monica cries)
Holy shit!
It's a gala!
(Lara giggles)
Come on, baby.
Here it is, Monica.
The answer to our mystery.
Get out there, darling.
Come on, now, darling.
Come on, I know you can do it.
Come on, first word.
Come on, sweetheart.
- Don't do it, Monica.
- Fuck you.
- Fuck me?
No, fuck you. (gun fires)
Come on, first word, baby!
Come on, here we go now!
Baseball, come on! - Swinging a bat.
- That's it, come on. - Bat, bat, sounds like.
Sounds like rat.
Fat.
Fat!
- [Barry] Keep going.
- Sounds like fat, rat, cat.
- Bang! - Cat.
- Second word!
- Evan, make him stop!
- Make me stop, Evan!
Make me stop!
Make me fucking stop!
Second word!
- Second word. (Monica cries)
- Come on.
- [Monica] Pout.
- That's it, baby, pout!
Keep going, sounds like!
Come on, come on! - Don't, don't.
- [Barry] Come on, come on!
Out, that's it!
Out!
Two words, fifth word.
- [Monica] Fifth word. - Come on, baby.
Fifth word. - Fifth word.
- Come on, come on, come on.
- Hunched over.
- No, come on. - Sagging.
- Come on, sounds like sagging.
That's it, come on, baby.
Come on. - Sag.
- Come on, come on. - Rag, tag.
- Keep coming. - Bag.
- Keep coming, that's it, bag!
- Bag.
- Put 'em all together.
- Cat's out of the bag.
- Bingo!
Cat's out of the fucking bag!
And too goddamn bad if it ain't a fucking TV show
or a fucking book!
- No cat's out of no bag, Bar.
I saw to that.
- [Barry] No, it's too late.
It's a little bit too late for that, Lara.
I saw you, Quinny.
And like I said, timing is everything.
Ev, I saw him do the dirty act, I remember.
The first time I laid eyes on you, I said,
"This ain't no gangster drug store capper we got here.
What we got ourselves here is a goddamn opportunity."
I said, "I gotta get to know this guy."
I said to myself, "The body in that bag,
the man that that woman is crying about,
because if he works for that company
that the woman on TV is talking about,
whoo, am I gonna be a rich, rich man."
Is Quinn Torris here?
- Hold on second, I'll dial his extension.
- Bingo.
(Barry chuckles)
And he did work for that company.
(Evan sobs)
(dark music)
So where is it, Quinny?
Come on, buddy, just tell me where it is.
Come on, Quinny.
I know you've been dying to tell someone,
you just wanna get it off your chest.
Just open up,
speak your mind,
and you will set your soul free!
(suspenseful music)
Come on, buddy, tell me where it is!
- What's your plan, Bar?
Take all the money and run?
Hmm?
Wishful thinking.
You see, these two puppy types right here
will run straight for the police
once you walk out that door.
And probably my husband, the wimp, will too.
You want that, huh?
Look around you, Bar.
Babes, what do you see?
- He sees a piece of shit.
(women grunt)
- Whoo, cat fight!
(suspenseful music)
(gun fires)
(Monica yells)
- Monica.
You bitch!
(Evan grunts) - Shut up.
Where were we?
Oh, yes.
You see a room full of people you don't want
and one that you do.
- Yeah?
Oh, you mean kill them and take you.
- Why not?
(Barry laughs)
- We'd sure as hell have a lot more fun
than I do with this loser.
God, talk about gullible.
He actually believed me when I told him
that I was fucking those stiff accountant types
for the money.
Hey, asshole.
I liked it.
You should have seen their faces when I'd strip.
It's always more fun to shock a creep than a hero.
They were so eager to please.
(Barry laughs)
- That's your wife, man.
(dark music)
- It's so simple.
Nobody will ever suspect us.
It's too obvious.
- What are you talking about?
- We'll nail that son of a bitch.
- Tell me this isn't happening.
- Please stop being such a loser, my baby.
- I'm not a loser.
- That's right, you're a winner.
I'm gonna make you a winner.
- Yeah.
- Look at us now.
Look at the shit we're in!
This never would have happened, Bar,
if you had been running the show.
He's a total fuckup.
He's a goddamn clown.
Hey, babes, where's your red nose and floppy shoes?
Hey.
I'm talking to you.
- No, no, no, I know, I know.
I've been sitting here and I've been watching this
and I'm hearing everything you're saying, Lara,
and I probably hate you about as much as anybody
could possibly hate anybody.
- Whew.
- But leave them alone, okay?
They didn't do anything, just leave them alone.
They still got a life.
I say we let them go, okay?
- Nah, I'm with red.
- [Quinn] I say let them go.
- No can do, buddy.
- [Lara] You know what you are?
You're a little candy-ass stupid cocksucker!
(Barry laughs)
You make me sick.
- I know.
I'm the cocksucker. - Hey.
- Let's hear it.
Let's hear it for the cocksucker.
Okay?
One,
two,
three! (gun fires)
- Oh, my God!
(dark music)
(Quinn laughs)
- Quinny.
Nice and easy, pal, easy does it.
(Quinn laughs)
- Oh, God.
- She still looks great, doesn't she?
- Well, it's just you and me now, Quinny.
Quinny, I liked her!
Right.
Let me tell you my plan.
You keep the money, fine so far?
You send me whatever I want,
whenever I want it,
from wherever I am.
Okay?
- You do what you want, I'm taking her to the hospital.
- This one's for you, red.
- No! (gun fires)
(Quinn yells)
- You fuck!
That'll do you, you fuck!
You fuck!
You ruined me!
You fucking ruined me!
You son of a bitch!
(gun fires)
You cocksucker!
Where's the money?!
Where's the fucking money?!
I'll kill her!
You son of a bitch!
You cocksucker!
(all yell)
(Evan chokes)
Bad day for fucks!
(gun fires)
(dark music)
(gun cocks)
(gun fires)
- Bad day for fucks.
(soft music)
- [Jude] It's hard not getting even
when you know who did it.
(dark music)
- [Lara] Who is this?!
Fucking freak.
- [Jude] I knew Barry knew too.
Or how could he live above the very place
in which my husband was thrown?
Like refuse.
It wasn't very difficult to piece together.
Not that many pieces to the puzzle.
- Quinn just got a call yesterday
and he and Paul,
they have to go upstate today on some business.
- Well, he just committed with me just now finally.
- Quinn just got a call yesterday.
- This just came in.
- A call yesterday.
- Just now.
- Hello, my darling.
(Jude cries)
Is it all right?
- Looks like it's gonna be all right,
if we set this up right for them.
- How did this happen to us?
- [Paul] It's a sign of the times, my darling.
Nowadays you can't even trust your best friends.
(phone beeps)
(dark music)
- [Jude] And in the end,
I guess I'm a bad guy too
because I couldn't resist feeling a little pleasure
knowing that the two of them might get theirs.
I mean, I knew what Barry wanted when I invited him.
(dark music)
- Get her to the hospital.
Hurry.
- Are you sure you're okay, honey?
(whimsical music)
(exciting music)