It’s Shakespeare with skin in “The Secret Sex Lives of Romeo and Juliet”, an outrageously bawdy, sexed-up version of the world’s most famous love story! A crackpot cast of mostly busty redheads performs the immortal tale of two lovers who end up loving just about everyone amidst a non-stop barrage of dumb jokes, gleeful nudity, rambunctious sex scenes, whipping, whipped cream, Derrick the Horny Hunchback, and literature’s most famous line of dialogue, “Sock it to me!”
This is a playful softcore comedy version of Romeo And Juliet. It actually begins at the Globe Theatre, where a drunk and rowdy audience demands to see Romeo And Juliet. They threaten to burn the theatre down if the play doesn't start immediately.
The characters are each introduced while in the middle of various sexual acts. The characters include six maids. Gregory fondles Lady Capulet's ass in the first scene.
The sword fight is between Gregory and Balthasar, performed to the cheering of the crowd of the playhouse. The Prince stops them, saying it's the third time they've disturbed the streets.
There is the repeated joke of the location of the play as "beautiful downtown Verona."
When we're introduced to Juliet, we see her having sex with the Prince. She of course doesn't want Romeo to find out.
Juliet tells the Nurse that she's certain Romeo is faithful to her. She then says, "Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?" And the film cuts to Romeo fondling Lady Capulet.
Capulet arranges the marriage between Juliet and Paris, although Paris is gay. There is a scene in the dungeon of the Capulet house, where a naked woman is being whipped for stealing Lady Capulet's scarves.
When Romeo stands in the garden beneath Juliet's balcony, it's revealed that another woman is going down on him. Meanwhile, someone is also under Juliet's dress, going down on her. When Romeo delivers his line about being a glove on her hand so he could touch that cheek, he touches the butt cheek of the woman in the garden.
Then there is a long and extremely boring orgy scene with the servants.
Romeo goes to the Friar to ask him to wed him to Juliet. He tells the Friar he killed Tybalt, so he'll be banished from "beautiful downtown Verona." The Friar fools around with the Nurse and gives her the message to give to Juliet. Juliet is so distraught by the news of Romeo getting banished that she takes the Nurse to bed.
Capulet comes into Juliet's room to let her know she'll be wed to Paris the next day. Friar goes to Juliet to give her the sleeping potion, leaving Romeo and the Nurse along, and because this was shot in the late 1960s, the Nurse shouts, "Sock it to me." Romeo. along with the rest of the folks in beautiful downtown Verona, hears that Juliet is dead and goes to her tomb. He finds the vial of the sleeping potion, and thinking it is poison, swallows what is left. He falls next to the coffin. Montague and Capulet enter the tomb, see the two dead, lift Romeo's body into the coffin with Juliet and put the lid on the coffin. After they leave, we hear Romeo and Juliet awake, and that's the end of the film.
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